August 12, 2013 by rachelcmann
This post contains Spoilers, although I’m not sure anyone cares at this point.
I thought Channing Tatum was in this movie? I barely remember the first movie, so I’m mainly watching this for a mindless 100 minutes of explosions and occasional eye candy (hello Storm Shadow!). But here’s my thought most of the way…”How can Duke be dead?” I really kept expecting him to pop up and it took me most of the film to realize they had really killed him off. Like, for realsies.
Okay, now that I hate myself for saying that.
I’m not sure there’s anything really redeeming about this movie unless you look at it as a study in pryotechnics. I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with that, just that there’s no meat on that burnt chunk of bone. Adrianne Palicki is gorgeous as always, even if they used her for her ability to make men stop functioning than as the soldier she is (I really wish they hadn’t just used her for her body.) And although I’d really love to see Bruce Willis in a role other than “former super soldier now living the regular life but with an arsenal hidden in the house” he certainly has that one down pat. There are some pretty awesome fight scenes. Ninjas swinging from impossibly long ropes around a cliff face was pretty damn cool. But man the body count was HIGH. Mostly bad guys, but some of those soldiers were just doing what they were told by the same guys who give the Joes their orders.
And doesn’t Cobra Commander’s ensemble look a LOT like Darth Vaders? What is it about bad guys with lung problems? Cobra Commander, Darth Vader, Bane…okay, but that still seems like more than a coincidence. Dude could rock a hi-lo jacket though.